Stoner’s Guide to Sex: Take Care of Your Heads

Dear Gloria,

I have heard sex on marijuana is great, but I can’t seem to make it happen. I get too “up-in-my-head” and self conscious of my body and am unable to enjoy it. I know it will feel good if I let it happen, how do I get past this?

-Jimmy R.

 Dear J.R.,

At times when I drank heavily, I had problems smoking marijuana. When I would smoke I would get “up-in-my-head” paranoid too. At the time, I would never have fathomed how I could possibly have stoned sex — it would be an excruciating journey through the disgusting realms of my mind while I was supposed to be enjoying physical pleasure.

I realize now that the reason I had this problem was because I had a lot to be “paranoid” about. I was using alcohol to medicate away any issues I needed to deal with. Too much alcohol leads to blackouts and bad decisions. Behaviors I was exhibiting while trying to suppress my thoughts only made them come out ten times worse when I was stoned.

So I realized it wasn’t about the stoned sex — it was about feeling comfortable in my skin. While having sex with strangers and partying and being a young, hip, barfly-twenty-something feeds the ego, it doesn’t nourish the soul. Marijuana is unlike any other drug — it makes you more aware of your physical and mental thoughts rather than suppressing them the way we do with other substances or addictions.

When you start liking the skin you are in, marijuana will only ignite the passion in the bedroom, but you gotta get right in the head.

Let me leave you with these words of wisdom written by The Toyes but popularized by Southern California classic Sublime:

“Hard work good, and hard work fine, but first take care of head.”

Take care of both your heads J.R.

Gloria Gazm answers your sex and relationship questions from a stoned perspective. Have a question for Gloria? Send your inquiries to her at gloria.gazm@gmail.com