Cannabis and Parental Surplus Syndrome

With all of the recent press about Child Protective Services (CPS) stepping in to ruin families of cannabis users, I thought it was time to reflect on how cannabis plays out in my family life, and how it makes me a better father. I’m sure our regular readers will nod their head in agreement, while people finding this post out of the blue may not understand at all, but cannabis is very good for me and my family.

Why? Quite simply, as Mark Wolfe described in the New York Times last year: cannabis opens me up to Parental Surplus Syndrome.

Parental Surplus Syndrome

First, let me say, I’m not a farmer. I wish I was, but I don’t have the space or time, and I’m not ready to have that conversation with my kids yet! I have 2 young boys (under the age of 3) and a loving wife. I voted for Prop. 215 back in 1996 and have my California medical marijuana recommendation, which I obtained originally to reduce my use of opiates like Oxycodone for back pain (with the MRIs to prove it). I’m also a bit of a high-strung person and have found that while I use indicas for calming my muscles, sativas are an excellent way for me to calm my head. I’m not talking couch-lock, “OMG, I can’t move my arms” kind of calm, I’m talking about slowing down my mental process so that I can stop and smell the roses. If you don’t believe me, just ask my wife (who currently abstains from cannabis use), she is very happy when I take a puff as part of my evening routine. After a long day at work and a not-so-fun commute, I get home, have a puff and the insignificant troubles melt away.

As part of this increased desire to smell the roses, I find that not only do I have significantly more patience for my little boys, I find that I’m seriously into playing with them and really spending time with them to help them learn and grow. Without that puff, my response to my boys is typically more along the lines of “daddy is busy right now”, or “daddy is tired, we can do that this weekend”. When I have had that puff, I find myself rolling around on the floor with the kids, playing with them and their toys, and generally engaging with them on their level. I don’t try to treat them like adults, I love them for who they are. The extra emotional energy I have for my kids and family when I use cannabis is what we refer to as Parental Surplus Syndrome.

One of my friends said a long time ago about trying weed for the first time: “it’s like I can focus on one thing”, and he was so right. Whether it’s that bass line in your favorite song, or the zestiness of the sauce on that slice of pizza, cannabis does help you focus on one thing. In short, when I have my cannabis, I pay more attention to one thing that is really important in life: my family.