An Open Invitation to Mr. Bill O’Reilly: Smoke a Bowl With Me

Dear Mr. Bill O’Reilly:

I couldn’t help but notice how angry you got a few days ago after the Denver Post, which is the paper of record in a city that will be one of the first in the country to legally sell marijuana come January 1, hired a marijuana editor to report on what is no doubt going to be a big deal.

While this isn’t surprising given your excellent track record of flying off the handle for things you really have no idea about, there was one thing in particular that really just didn’t sit right with this weedist.

Here’s one of the many ridiculous things you said on your program, taken from the article on Forbes:

“Shouldn’t they hire a booze columnist…to say, “Look, this is the best way to get high?…Why don’t you just set it up like, “Here’s the bar in Denver where you can get the cheapest chasers and the most gin for your money?”

It would be silly, of course, to simply just talk about how exactly getting blackout drunk and smoking some weed is different, because everyone knows that you’re not going to listen to some kid from Denver who works in a dispensary and writes for a weed blog in his spare time. Even if I came on your show, that wouldn’t get us anywhere because we both know you wouldn’t let me a get a word in edgewise.

So I’ve got a proposal for you, and for that matter, anyone else who has a problem:

Come to Denver and smoke a bowl with me. I’ll show you that a few hits of marijuana is NOTHING like even just one shot of hard liquor.

Maybe after you’ve loosed up a bit, we can start talking about how it’s a bad idea to have a talk show and have guests on, only to not let those guests talk and simply yell at them instead. Or maybe we can skip that and you can just go on the next Factor and tell the world what a majority of Americans now know to be true: marijuana, when used responsibly (and honestly, even when used pretty recklessly) is a significantly less harmful substance than alcohol or just about any other vice you can possibly name.

Maybe after that spot airs, we can get a few others to come kick it with me and toke up, especially lawmakers who are making the rules for a substance they have never even tried.

You just never know until you try.